I’ve written before about how my blog is disgusting, but I’ve pretty much gotten over the fact that the vast majority of people who find my blog through Google are doing so to find some kind of sexual service in Taiwan or the Philippines; so it’s time to talk about Taiwan Strip Clubs and Lady KTVs. It never really got my panties in a twist, anyway; I write what I write. One thing I recently noticed is that there’s more people looking for strippers, stripping, and strip clubs in Taiwan, in particular, Taichung. In fact, I’ve gotten requests from people who want to know more about “how things work” here in Taiwan, most of whom are people who aren’t trolling for sex but are just curious, after reading this article about Whoring Around Asia. I like to inform people of stuff and, since I have inside information a lot of other people don’t have, I’m happy to put out unbiased information on the subject.
First, strip clubs exist in Taiwan, but they are insanely difficult to find. It’s easier to find a Red Light District in Taiwan than it is to find a strip club. What’s even easier is to find a Lady KTV, where it’s basically like renting your own little VIP/Champagne Room for two hours.
If you can find a strip club, you’re going to have to travel to get there. The closest one I know to Taichung is almost an hour away from the City Center. I don’t even know how to get there; I go there with my Taiwanese friends. If you want to find a strip club, make some horny Taiwanese friends – without them, you’re screwed. I can not help you – it’s like going to The Batcave – you might somehow manage find your way there, but you’ll never find your way back there without the help of a superhero. And it’s possible that you’ll get told you’re not allowed in, if you’re a lone white guy. It’s the same in the Red Light Districts; I’ve heard multiple pimps tell my Asian friends that they won’t let white guys near their girls. They claim we’re “too big” and break them (most of that is made up by the girls, who use sex with a white guy as an excuse to get out of work for a couple of days).
Cover charge for your typical strip club is $600NT (~$20US) and it gets you into the club and provides you with a couple of beers. Some places will run you $1000NT (~$35US), though even the cheaper places charge more during holidays, like most Taiwanese businesses do. The club itself will remind you of any other strip club, except all the strippers are Taiwanese. Most Taiwanese girls don’t shave anything below the waist and most are not well-endowed in the chest; just things to keep in mind, if you’re used to hairless big-tittied strippers.
A lap dance will run you $100NT (~$3US) and can last anywhere from thirty seconds to five minutes. It’s best to sample what the house has to offer and then you’ll know who you want and who you don’t – just like any other strip club. Finding a cutie who will stick around for a few minutes and bust out a neck/shoulder massage at the end is about the best you can hope for. If you go with a four-man crew and are spreading around at least $2000NT (~$70US) per hour from your table, you can expect all the attention you want. But keep in-mind…
If you drop $1000NT (~$35US) to get in and, over the next two hours, spend $1000/hour…you’re looking at $3,000NT (~$110US) for maybe a half hour of attention every hour – and you’re competing for it with a bunch of other guys who want the same service. Not to mention you had to drive an hour to get there and will have to drive an hour to get back. That $3,000NT (~$110US) might be better served by going to a Lady KTV. You’ll pay a little more, but you’ll get far greater service. Here’s why.
When you walk into a Lady KTV, you are basically served a buffet of girls. Most Lady KTV don’t charge covers, though you are expected to buy a bottle when you walk in – that will cost you $1000NT (~$35US). You might also have to pay $200NT-300NT (~$7US-10US) to buy one of the girls a drink, and then sit and chat with her and see how you like her. If you like her, you can get yourself a booth. Now, you don’t have to go that route. You can just walk in, buy a bottle of Scotch, point to a girl and say, “I’ll take her!” and that’s that – off to the booth with you!
Booths cost $3000NT-$4000NT (~$110-145US) for two hours, unless you’re going to crazy expensive places (like Gold Money Jaguar, where it can cost $10000NT (~$330US) for two hours). But, your service is going to vary depending on who you pick, and it’s best to determine that before you get locked-in with a girl. Generally-speaking, you have three grades of KTV girl:
Grade A: slammin’ hot and not obligated to do much, because of that. They’ll sit, drink, flirt, and sing – if you’re lucky, they might get topless.
Grade B: not as hot as Grade A, but are willing to do much more. They will likely be completely naked after an hour and will be extremely friendly and fun. Sometimes, you might even get a blowjob, depending on how much of a gentleman you are.
Grade C: just like a strip club, you’ll always have the busted cast. They might be uglier or older, but they’re going to be extremely willing to please; even having sex is not off-the-table.
So it’s really a question of what you want, when you go. Most guys will tell you to go for a Grade B – it’s a good compromise. But, understand, these grades are made by the clients – you can’t ask the KTV, “Can you give me a nice B-Grade girl?” They won’t know what you mean. So it’s best to bring a Taiwanese friend to negotiate, to be sure you get what you want. Negotiating with a pimp in a Red Light District, you can be as direct as you want…but at a Lady KTV, you have to have a little finesse.
You have a lot of options, here in Taiwan. The question is: what do you want and what will you pay? If you’re willing to go to a strip club and make it rain, you’ll be really popular – but you might also have guys come up to your table and give you a piece of their minds, for hogging all the action. You won’t get that at a Lady KTV, and you’ll spend around the same amount to get the attention you’re seeking. The other benefit of a Lady KTV is, lots of the girls will leave with you, for the right price – even a Grade A girl will step to a hotel with you for three hours, for between $6000NT-10000NT ($220US-$330US).
If you’re a foreigner, this is like chump change, for what you get. Go to a bar at 10pm and start drinking and meeting girls – take one into a private setting for two hours – take them to a hotel/motel for three hours, and call it a night. If you’re in Taichung and need a room, I recommend Lanna over any other place – most rooms will run $2000NT-3000NT (~$70US-110US) per night and beat most any other accommodation you’ll find in the city. The whole affair will run you between $12000NT-$18000NT(~$430US-$640US), which is a decent deal, by Western standards – six hours of drinking, fun, and playing doctor averages less than a hundred bucks an hour.
If you just want the fun without the sex, you could spend as little as $5000NT (~$185US) for three hours at a strip club or three hours at a Lady KTV. Do you want thirty lapdances from different girls, or few hours of uninterrupted attention from one girl? It’s not about what’s better or worse – it’s about personal preference. It’s up to you, what you want to choose: Taiwan Strip Clubs or Lady KTVs.
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